Food & Drink
The Top 5 Reasons Bernie Sanders Would Not Make A Good Chipotle GM
It's that time of year again, Borfesinesspeople of the world. The Annual Year-End Holiday List Blast is back, and we're coming hard out of the pipes with our first installment. [...]
On Making Love to Pizza
Many women are barren, but do we chastise such couples, when--point in fact-- inseminating your infertile wife is the exact same thing as inseminating a pizza? [...]
Borfes’ Top 5 Lists of 2014
Whittling down this year’s registers proved no easy task. Our editorial staff debated late into second breakfast as to this year’s picks, but when the dust and blood and tranquilizers finally settled, these final 5 remained… [...]
It’s a Turd! Arizona Extends Abortion Ban to Food Babies
“I was a Thanksgiving baby. And yes, I am a food baby. My father was a turkey leg, three fishsticks, and half a slice o’ sweet potato pie. And distinguished members of the House, food babies is about to get their due.” [...]
Putin to NATO: “Eat My Frozen Shit.”
"I will club them like seal and wear them like coat,” concluded the Russian president, as he cleared the powder from his face with licked wrist and paw like a cat presiding. “This is promise.” [...]
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