Politics
New World Odor: Smellection Time VOTE
I don’t know how, but by the spite of some poo-litical God or Devil or something in between, like a solid loaf that quickly looses into sprays and pellets--a floater has emerged. [...]
Help Not Wanted: A Comedy Business Insight
Jay Leno quoted (I think it was) Shakespeare when he said, "Should we have an election of jesters, the comedians shall drown in the wake." He then added, "I'm glad I never had to do that shit. Comedy, not Shakespeare. Do you want any of this?" [...]
Donald Trump Kills Last African Rhino
Donald Trump. Making America great again, one extinction at a time. [...]
And I Thought LAST Year Was Bad.
I am prepared in mind and spirit and preparing now in force for the ever-prophesied “what we had coming to us.” [...]
The Top 5 Reasons Bernie Sanders Would Not Make A Good Chipotle GM
It's that time of year again, Borfesinesspeople of the world. The Annual Year-End Holiday List Blast is back, and we're coming hard out of the pipes with our first installment. [...]
The Art of The Donkey Show pt. III: Veni, Vidi, Donki
The modern world’s depiction of crime and business is eternally skewed. How does a simple farmdonkey in a sex show go from the streets to the throne on the strength of his rocket? [...]
Russian Rocket Makes Major Whoopsky
Officials from the DGTP are now investigating into why exactly the Russian Federal Space Agency would even have logged in coordinates for the IS. “Surely you can’t just type in those letters and safely deliver a rocket to the enemy like that, I mean, that’s fucking stupid.” [...]
On Making Love to Pizza
Many women are barren, but do we chastise such couples, when--point in fact-- inseminating your infertile wife is the exact same thing as inseminating a pizza? [...]
Kanye West Announces “Medical Condition”
Weighing in on the severity of the situation, presumed asexual librarian Beck said something. But our team weren’t really listening as we thought we might miss something said by Mr. West. [...]
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