Remembering Bob Marlee

NEW YORK, NY– For many today, the tributes started at dawn. The maids and servants pulling an all-nighter, made sure those leaders of the new world and the order of their seed would miss not a beat as they woke up this morning and smiled with the rising sun.

For today, we celebrate the birth of late hedge fund CEO and convicted felon Bob Marlee, former executive officer at Lehman Brothers (LEH) and board member at First Crude Incorporated (CRUD).

In Bob, we found a man sure of his Jah-given right to anything he desired. A man who had no fear of atomic energy. A man not bound by the laws decided upon by the elected officials of this or any nation. A man who, despite his many slights against friend and family alike, wanted you to know just where he stood. The man who, in truth, carved the ivory stone white privilege is etched upon.

An exodus followed Bob out of Lehman when he was found guilty of grand larceny and laundering. Whether this was down to the firm’s bankruptcy and ultimate liquidation is neither here nor there. What is certain, is Bob’s influence. “Is this love?” he would ask, from the shelter of his single bed in holdup, reaching out to the many he had touched and worked with and irreparably destroyed on the outside. “No,” they replied. “This is illegal.”

And after seven months in a Santa Monica Low Level “Security Home,” Bob returned, only to prove his life was worth much more than gold. His work with First Crude through the digital age got him the label of the “Natural Mystic” from fellow board members and local cathouse regulars. And his final “Authorization of the Only Percent,” most agree, got to fulfill the book.

Leaving us far too soon in 2012, after a brush with autoerotic asphyxiation and two Bangkoki escorts, Bob’s message lives on. “Emancipate yourselves from mental slavery. Give thanks and praise to the Lord, and I will feel all right, at a fifteen percent interest rate.”

A true soul rebel. Every day, we aim to emulate. Rest in peace, Bob.